Love can indeed kill, because anger gets in the way.
In a study by University of Michigan on 192 couples, nine out of 12 men who died of cancer were married to women who suppressed anger. Researchers found out that men’s anger suppression affected the cancer toll among women. This is doubly true when both were anger suppressors.
We never fail to downgrade anger’s role in the power play of our lives. It could be considered the most prolific threat to our relationships and our general health. Twenty-five centuries ago in India, Buddha achieved the insight that three states of mind were the source of all our unhappiness. These are wrong knowing, obsessive desire, and anger, above all. All of these are difficult, however in only one instant of anger – which one of the most powerful emotions – lives can be ruined, and health and spiritual development can be destroyed.
Evidence from numerous studies make it clear how constant chronic anger and aggression raise your risk of developing deadly forms of heart disease by as much as five times than the norm. We not only got affected when we suppress anger but also when we tend to express it, especially through hostility. Bottom line is, if you notice that you immediately get angry when you have to wait in a long line, or if you find yourself constantly yelling at your loved ones, then you’re not only hurting you’re relationships, you are also slowly killing yourself.
Recent researches indicate that chronic anger are more damaging to women than to men if it is suppressed. Still, suppressed anger in men also affects their health as well. However, it is clear that suppressed anger is not really the problem but the lack of control over the situations that cause the anger. This is what determines the long-term health effects of anger.
The long-term study done in Michigan analyzed women, as compared to men, who suppressed their anger had a higher mortality rate. However, those women who suppressed their anger in confrontations with their spouses had twice the mortality risk as other the women. Come to think of it, these effects of anger are even worse than negative life-style factors such as smoking and high blood pressure.
However, there really is no friendly side with anger especially to women for another study indicated that women who vented their anger are also at risk. These type of women were identified to be more pessimistic, lacking in social support, sensing limited control over their lives, and had greater health problems. So, the real deal is that neither venting nor suppressing anger benefits women, and even men. The source of the problem is the source of anger itself and the inability to deal effectively with the situations which brings about the anger must be the one that has it be addressed.
Another recent research shows that men who have poor anger management skills are also more likely to suffer a heart attack before age 55. Another separate study indicated that older male subject’s hostility ratings, that is, how hostile they tend to act, predicted heart disease more accurately than the other more blatant risk factors like cholesterol, alcohol intake, cigarette smoking and overweight.
In the same way, High blood pressure or Hypertension reactivity are also related to the expression of anger. A research study examined the effect of harassment and distraction on men and it showed that only highly hostile men showed increases in blood pressure and more lingering anger and irritation than the less hostile men.
These and similar studies ONLY suggests that there is a strong link between anger and physiological hyperactivity. Angry people’s tendency to easily become aroused is responsible for their stress especially for prolonged periods. This in turn causes significant and cumulative damage to their bodies.
Having read the dire effects of anger it is important to minimize the negativity of anger in both men and women. We need to increase our skill in dealing with anger-producing situations by slowly changing our perceptions so that even if the situations around us can’t be changed, the response can be other than anger. Here are some sound suggestions to stay healthy by keeping away from the clutches of anger.
Be vigilant of what you allow yourself to be consumed by your senses. The company we keep can very well dictate our anger patterns as can be seen in one conversation with an extremely negative person whose words may poison you. You may ingest a lot of anger from the people surrounding you or when you listen to the news, when you read the newspaper or such. Although we cannot avoid these situations, just be mindful of what you’re taking in. In fact, having positive people around can help keep a person’s perspective more upbeat.
Practice the art of empathy, or being in the other person’s place. We lessen our anger towards another when we truly understand and feel the difficulty if his or her situation.
Monitoring cynical thoughts and identifying when they occur for this can help you in minimizing their effects. Learning and practicing assertiveness, as opposed to bullying, can also increase your control of the situation.
Avoid taking refuge in eating to forget your sorrows and depression. Overeating can create difficulties for the digestive system which only contribute to the arising of anger. When this happens, too much energy is produced and if you do not know how to handle this, it can become the energy of anger, sex, and violence.
Eat well to be more healthy and capable of handling situations. This can mean eating less because the truth is, we need only half the amount of food that we eat every day. To do this, practice the patience of eating very slowly so that you will be a Le to absorb much more nutrition. To aid you further to eat well, also be aware of your eyes and don’t trust them because our eyes are bigger than our stomach.
We must know exactly what amount of food we really need. The bowl used by a monk or nun are used as an instrument for appropriate measure. This kind of bowl is used to protect us from being deceived by our eyes by allowing you only to eat what can be contained in it.
Discuss a strategy of mindful consumption with the people you love, with members of your family, even if they are still young. Children can understand this, so they should participate in such discussions.Cultivate an environment that will help you by including your family in. Together you can make decisions about what to eat, what to drink, what to read, what television programs to watch, and what kind of conversations to have.